I’ve been on this planet called Earth for an eye-blink (38 years) in the grand scheme of things.
But I’m not talking to an amoeba.
I’m talking to you, friend.
And there is much I have learned that may just help you.
Try these on for size:
1. It’s OK not to always feel fantastic.
We live in an age completely deluded by what it means to feel ‘normal.’
We strive for this magical concept of ‘happiness’ and prize it above all else.
In our striving, we inadvertently make ourselves miserable.
It’s ok to feel off. Because in the acceptance of it, we’ll be quickly lifted anyway.
2. Being OK with hearing NO is a superpower.
One of the common traits I see among those who seem to succeed at higher levels and rarely give up is this: They are ok with a no.
They don’ take a ‘no’ personally.
What do I mean by ‘no’ here? Any form of rejection, failed experiment, or loss can be seen as a no.
People who go far know that a ‘no’ is just data received on the journey to success. People who take NOs seriously are more susceptible to quitting.
3. There’s no better mentor than your own deeper intelligence.
I’ve allowed people to pepper me with advice over the years and pull me from one direction to the next.
Yes, learning from others who’ve made mistakes is helpful, but after a point, you need to follow your own felt instinct.
Be careful here because you want to follow what you know is true, not a thought that emanates from a deluded, jaded and/or selfish part of you.
You’ll know it’s the right way when it feels right. Now act.
4. There is no ideal path laid out for you.
Stop thinking there is - it depresses you.
All you need to do is find something that intrigues you enough to stick with it for a decent length of time. Expect it to suck frequently.
You’ll keep going because you know it can’t always be sunshine and unicorns.
It’s the consistency and willingness to find enjoyment in the monotony of it that gives you an incredible edge.
It’s here you will find your ‘path.’
5. If in doubt, take on winning habits.
If you’re looking for a definition of ‘happiness,’ this is it: take on the habits of winners. What are they for you? You’re not stupid.
You know that certain things make you feel worse overall. Life is super simple in this way.
Do loser habits and feel like a loser. Do winner habits every day and feel like a winner.
When you feel like a winner you will do better. It’s that simple.
6. Creativity makes you more creative.
The secret to success lies in understanding the gentle beauty of momentum.
But make sure it’s is taking you in the right direction.
You’ll know it’s right because it feels right in your gut.
We get depressed for one reason: our body tells us we’re building momentum in the wrong thing.
Don’t slip. Get moving with what is good for you.
7. You don’t need ‘fixing.’
Society has programmed us to think we need to work on ourselves to become better people.
This is nonsense.
Beneath all your self-criticisms, you are already whole, happy and real.
It’s not on your to be better - only in skill and taking on new experiences.
In the absence of self-berating thoughts you are strong and you are well.
8. The more you try to control your thoughts, the more anxious you become.
I’ve learned that stress and feelings of anxiety are directly related to how much I try and interfere with my thinking.
It’s like scratching an itch.
It’s tempting to overanalyse when we don’t feel safe.
But the real ‘trick’ is to leave it alone. Return to what you were DOing instead.
9. Being light-hearted makes you luckier.
It needn’t depend on your circumstances that you enjoy yourself.
It needn’t be that the sun should be out for you to feel good. You bring the enjoyment. You choose happiness. It’s internally-driven.
And when you choose to take things with a light-heartedness, things will open up for you.
Your mind clears.
You see things others miss.
People respond better to you.
Opportunities present themselves when you’re light.
Thanks for reading.
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The point about NO hit home. I'm also wondering- how can we say NO in a way that is less hurtful to others?
Alex I’m using every single one of your resources atm. It’s helping. Thank you. My situation is critical atm and if I get through it , it will be partly due to you. ❤️. Linda.